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???

churchofsterek:

gallifreyslocked:

when i was in year 5, i did a speech on clumsiness for my school’s public speaking contest and to be clever, i tripped on my way to the stage dropping my note cards all over the place, but then i pulled the real ones out of my pocket saying ‘if you’re going to be clumsy, it pays to be prepared!’

everyone lost their shit and i got second place

If you got second place who got first… Did they talk about fire safety and burn the stage down or something

(Source: thewinterswidow, via greetings)



nosdrinker:

my english teacher accused me of plagiarizing an essay i wrote about my own life

(via distraction)



amoying:

QUICK, PUT YOUR LIPS ON MINE IT’S AN EMERGENCY

(via pizza)



online:

when the PE teacher makes you run

image

(via tipslip)



elux:

I’ve played entire games of Mario Kart watching the wrong screen

(via hoebama)